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Homesick: Phase of Growing Up!

Fievielia Sugita
3 min readApr 17, 2016

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Are you a foreigner? Overseas student? New employee in outlandish city? Yes, you might often experience the what-so-called homesick. Missing the hustle bustle ambiance at home, the famous mouth-watering food, epic friends to hang out with, and indeed love from family and relatives. These are a normal phenomenon yet are slowly curable. Hardly survive. Barely smile. Always suffer. But well, you are not alone.

Those who have lived far away from home hold strong faith onto their hand. I might call them as ambitious-realist. Most pals I have observed are exact the same: the strong-willed man or unbeatable woman standing with cheers outside yet morose inside. They are striving hard to alleviate the homesick nerves: neither feeling lost in soul nor crying soft in mind. Why I could say so?

Starves to cares? Endless hitches?

I do feel the same. Living alone for 4 years is such an immense challenge. I am growing up with warmth and pure cares surrounds in town. I have three annoying yet caring siblings and never-ending-grumbles yet loving parents. I used to think of living in capital city would be no problem as I would still live in the same country yet merely different land. Yet I was totally wrong. I got culture shocked in every facet. I cried almost every night in the first month why I was so hard nut deciding to pursue hard on my will. Life treated me way too bad. People fooled me around in crowd. I have got sucked in both improper relationship and kinship with blood and blades. I have had no one to confide in. I never told mom and dad as they could have worried much on me. These have driven me mentally out of control for years. I never stopped yelling out myself as dumb bell. I was deadly craved for a small yet pure care to keep me stay positive. Yet I still have found none here.

Heaps of problems came by, hurts were left un-stitched. But I soon realize the more I suffer, the more I grow up. From an introvert-cheerful damsel with ribbons over head into an extrovert-bold woman in-the-making. Life keeps on changing as time keeps on ticking. People change every second, every time, and so do I.

I learn to live up with different lenses of eyes. I can’t eye the same perspective. Pining away from homesick won’t make any better. I brain-squeeze to keep mind on busy. I take every chance strikes to add on more lenses. Hence, this has driven me winning some awards that I have never thought to gain of. When I starve to cares, I give pure empathy unto those who need. Hence, pals called me as an understanding friend to share with. Every good moment I have nourished was basically derived from bullying effects and uncontrollable-thirsty caring needs. When one tries to knock you down, hit yourself up. What I have learned deep of homesick is no one has an actual pure help for you. Every mankind on earth is selfish. Count me in. Every one merely takes you for granted in needs. Remember, what defines us is how well we rise after falling.

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